The following quote is from the article "Six Lies about Six" which was published in Breakaway. This is a magazine Focus of the Family intends for teenage boys.
When she says “no” she means “yes.”
The danger of this lie is that it contains a big chunk of truth.
Just like you, girls are created to enjoy intimacy. They have sexual desires. Often they will express those desires by saying no, when they really want to say, “Keep it up, but don’t go too fast. I like to be turned on slowly.” That’s all true, inside of marriage or out. Girls like the buildup as much as guys like the finale.
The lie is exposed when we think of the Person living inside that girl – assuming she’s a believer in Jesus, like you. As believers, you both have Jesus residing within (Galatians 2:20). So while you’re sitting in that cozy room with the love seat, her “no” really means “no” because it reflects the whisperings of Jesus in her soul.
What does Jesus say on the subject of sex before marriage? “Flee!” (1 Corinthians 6:18). Regardless what your body tells you—or hers, for that matter—Jesus’ voice is the one you should be listening to. He’ll consistently say “no,” and his no never means yes.
His is the voice of reason, and Jesus always says what He means.
No. No. NO. When SHE say NO. She means NO. STOP. QUIT. She doesn't mean: Jesus, wants us to stop. She means: I want you to stop. NOW. Her no meaning no has nothing to do with Jesus. It has everything to do with her saying no.
What they are really saying here is that the words of women don't mean anything. Once again, we are told we have no right to speak. Boys don't have to listen to a girl telling them "NO" because she doesn't matter. They only have to listen to some balding, white male's version of Jesus that as best as I can tell bears no resemblence to any Jesus of the gospels, probably none to the historical Jesus, and I pray no resemblence at all the actual Christ. What the hell kind of magazine thinks that it's a good idea to tell teenage boys that when a girl says no, she really only wants more foreplay? I guess one that sees women as whores or madonnas. Liars and tricksters. Certainly not as human beings.
But now my morbid fascination is up and running. I must go find how many other creative ways Focus on the Family has to teach teenage boys that girls aren't people too.
1 comment:
I actually have heard a FEW things out of Focus on the Family that I almost liked. But overall, I find nothing particularly useful and plenty flat out pointless. It is a bunch of fluff. And when I was a kid, it was one of the only commonalities I could see between "thinking" Church of Christers and "thinking" Baptists & Methodists. We could not get together on "doctrine" but we could all agree on spanking kids.
What a load of crap to get together on. I have words for it, but I don't use them blogging! And that was the SUBSTANCE this ministry had to offer.
Actually, I did hear a missionary who fascinated me on the radio program one time. I even taped it. Loaned the tape and now it is gone. That tape is the only evidence I HAD that FOTF ever offered anything worthwhile! Sorry it is gone.
I remember hearing another time a story that brought me to tears about a bomber fighter in WWII flying home from a mission crippled from the fight. The belly gunner was stuck in the turret and the pilot told everyone to bale out. The belly gunner could not get free though and when the last man prepared to jump, he turned and watched the pilot kneel and take the bellygunners hand and tell him "We will ride this one down together!"
Flat out busted me up! I was so taken with this story that I had heard on the Focus Radio program as gospel truth that I literaly cried like an idiot. A couple years later, I recited this story to a classmate in college. And I cried again telling it!
Then a couple years after that I read a fascinating book called THE MYTH OF REPRESSED MEMORY by Elizabeth Loftus. In that book Loftus describes how President Reagan once told this same story at a press conference. The Pres had thought he had heard it from a war hero. It turns out it was a scene in a movie he had acted in! The whole thing was FICTION! Good fiction, but still FICTION!!!! This means Focus was promoting the story falsely too!
My God. Now I cry from the embarrassement.
I guess I don't actively hate Focus on the Family, but I really have no use for them. Dobson really does at least as much harm as good in my estimation. I never promote him or his ministry.
Jesus is Lord!
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