Obama = Kara Thrace

Harbinger of the Apocalypse and all that good stuff.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

As is usual when Tim LaHaye and the monstrous work of bad writing and worse theology known as Left Behind is brought up, the Metra is left to say: What, what now? Of course, Rachel Maddow said: What, what now? with far more style than I can muster.

Question, if the Anti-Christ will be a commie socialist, why was the early Christian community described in Acts functioning as a commune?

Good to know...

Mike Huckabee is not pro-sodomy. Just in case you were wondering.



File under, the hell?

h/t Box Turtle Bulletin

Music Meme!

Yes, somewhere in the middle of scribbling frantic thoughts on boddhisattva's, homoeroticism in the lives of holy fools, and queer critiques of marriage theology, I stopped to play this game.

Put your MP3 player on shuffle, and write down the first line of the first twenty songs. Post the poem that results. The first line of the twenty-first is the title.

i’ll tell you something…

destiny, destiny protect me from the world --
the Mississippi Delta is shining like a national guitar --
they watch you, your expert double exs

your cd collection looks shiny and costly
you can look, but you can’t touch
whatcha gonna do when the party’s over?
take me back to dear old blighty?
time is like a broken watch

isn’t god allowed to think?
i am he, as you are he, and we are all together
touch your thighs, i’m the lonely one
i tried to fall in it again

adia, i do believe i’ve failed you
what you want, what you got . . .

i can’t believe the news today
because the world is round
a sub-granite wall numbs our bones
on nights like this when the world’s a bit amiss
give me some of this
anytime i need to see your face

Mwahahahaha!

A Swing...

...and a miss for Cindy McCain.



Are you serious, ma'am? Do you understand how flipping big Russia is? Is your entire understanding of foreign policy based on Risk where you can launch a nice attack on North America from Kamchatka?

Repeat after me: Putin is not an idiot. He will happily piss off America by expanding Russian Federation control over former Soviet republics. He will not attack America. Why? Because Vladimir Putin is not an idiot.

If John McCain were that great on foreign policy, you might think he might correct a misunderstanding on the part of his wife that's this glaring.

h/t to Pam's House Blend

How's life in my neck o' the woods?

This, approximately.

Yes, Picard would totally kick Kirk's Behind

And I don't know enough about Doctor Who to make a prediction, but I totally wish I could see this production of Hamlet.

Zombies!

From Zan at Butterfly Cauldron:

And now, to the meme:

You are in a mall when zombies attack. You have:
1. One weapon
2. One song blasting on the speakers
3. One famous person to fight along side you

My weapon of choice: Oxy-acetylene cutting torch, tanks on a hand-cart, of course.

Our themesong: "Mean Town Blues" Johnny Winter

Famous side-kick: A certain college prof, preferably about with a certain college friend. That doesn't count, well...fiddlesticks. St. Andrew of Constantinople, then. (There is method, here, I promise.)

TAG!

On the Theme of Small and Cute Animals...

When I was younger, I was huge fan of the Redwall series. (I still take a bit of pride in having been an active member of the online fanclub Dibbuns Against Bedtime that was integrated into one of the later novels. Even if I haven't read said later novel.)

So, I thought I'd reread Redwall -- why not?

The opening scene is our bumbling little novice friend, Matthias the mouse tripping across the abbey in an oversized tunic and sandals. What's my first thought?

Geez, Abbott Mortimer is certainly failing according to the Rule of Saint Benedict, which specifically instructs the Abbott to ensure that all novices and brothers have properly fitting robes.

Ah -- the joys of being a religions geek!

I is bored

so I steal meme from enGender

A couple of recent memes:

1. What is your favorite word? koneshno
   
2. What is your least favorite word? hush
   
3. What turns you on? hmm...
   
4. What turns you off? theological fellatio
   
5. What is your favorite curse word? currently, k cherty, which is a fairly mild russian curse
   
6. What sound or noise do you love? rain on a tin roof
   
7. What sound or noise do you hate? crickets
   
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? film director
   
9. What profession would you not like to attempt? business
   
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? rock on
    

and

• If you get something out of a vending machine, it’s most likely the: highly caffeinated citrus soda
  
• A word you sometimes catch yourself misspelling: secede -- yes, I'm a sorry excuse for a southerner
  
• You least want people to see you as: normal
  
• You’re a little scared of: walking alone
  
• The least attractive thing you do in your sleep: drool
  
• The number of contacts in your cell phone: i haven't the foggiest
  
• How many of them are relatives: relatively few
  
• You lose your cool when someone: paraphrases Bill O'Reilly
  
• When you go to the drugstore, you often can’t leave without buying: chocolate
  
• Your dance moves can best be described as: sugar high or drunk
  
• The majority of your underwear is: hipster cut
  
• Something you eat even though you hate how bad it is for you: soda pop, soda pop
  
• You think you’re really not a great: artist
  
• How much cash is in your wallet right now: eighty something
  
• The majority of your shoes are this color: hmm...black
  
• You don’t think you’ll ever be able to get rid of your: book-collecting habit
  
• If your breath is bad, it’s most likely because you had the: soda pop
  
• You feel embarrassed when you: completely mispronounce words
  
• The last public place where you used the restroom: EV Lodge
  
• Something you don’t like to debate in mixed company: you know, I'll pretty much debate anything anywhere
  
• You don’t think you can pull off wearing: short skirts
  
• Something you own entirely too much of: books? no, there can not be too many books
  
• Someone you would love to see in concert who might bring down your street cred: umm...Depeche Mode
  
• The last thing that you spilled on yourself: soy sauce
  
• If you were on a reality show, the producers would likely portray/characterize you as the: I'd say holy fool, but that might be a delusion of grandeur -- um, the screwball intelligent
  

I got Witnessed in Peter.

Enter the ICHC online Poker Cats Contest!

RadHumor

Radical feminist I may not be, but damned if they don't have an amusing since of humor.

Today's exhibit: Mary Daly's Website.

Wrong number

File under things I do not have the power to do, number 100 and something.

No, I can't reinstate your driver's license.

I love my job. I get the best questions.

Bad Language! Bad, bad language!

No cookie for you, English.

Holy Fools. Fools for Christ. Holy Foolishness. Etc. Etc. and so on and so forth.

You see, I would presume, how these are not good terms. Especially for net and database searches. What with different people using different versions and making up their own and making me sad.

Russian has a nice, concise word for this amorphous-in-English concept: юродство / yurodstvo.

This proves (at least until I change my mind) that Russian is a superior language.

Shame on you, English.

And, I have reminded myself why I don't like donut holes. Oh, well, college campus -- they shan't go to waste!

How do I get out of this one?

I know! I'll use a plot device!

This Dominic Deegan strip makes me smile. I should probably print it out and hang it over my desk.

If, that is, it looks as though I will ever have time to write another word of fiction again.

I wonder if the Religious Studies department has ever had a major turn their senior paper into performance art before. But there are so many possibilities for a project on Holy Fools, and such a frustrating lack of blindingly obvious scholarly resources on the Internet.

Who knows -- should the insomnia keep up, performance art of a follyful persuasive might cease to be optional.

It knows something....

I think my notebook knows it was just replaced. What with my word processor crashing every few minutes -- whilst I try to write a paper.

*stab*

Hurry up new computer!

Old computer, I'm sorry, really, I am. You've served me well for over four years now. We've gone through some rough times together. I promise to retire you with the dignity befitting your service, but I've got to have something that turns on reliably.

Quote of the Day

"Look at this beautiful sunset! It looks like a building is on fire." Bryan

Homeward Bound- The Playlist

Otherwise known as a way of procrastinating while using other people’s creativity to attempt to express my complicated relationship with that odd concept of “home.” And for anyone who ever wondered what I listened to beyond the endlessly quoted Soundgarden and Depeche Mode.

Yes “American Idiot” would be on here, if it had ripped correctly from my CD. Alas, it did not. Although, perhaps, it would have been redundant.

1. “Homeward Bound” Simon and Garfunkel
(Maybe I should add “Keep the Customer Satisfied” – “I get slandered. Libeled. I hear words I never heard in the Bible.”)
2. “South is Only a Home” The Fiery Furnaces
(This song perfectly expresses my relationship with the South – nonsense, with an odd overlay of perceived meaning.)
3. “Runnin’ Blue” The Doors
(“Back down, turn around slowly, try it again.” I should add this to my mirror I think.)
4. “Honky Cat” Elton John
(I may have quit those redneck ways, but I want some redneck food.)
5. “Be Yourself” Audioslave
6. “Otherside” Red Hot Chilli Peppers
7. “Barrel of a Gun” Depeche Mode
8. “Graceland” Paul Simon
(No, I still refuse to actually go to Graceland until I no longer live in Memphis, or have visiting guests to use as an excuse.)
9. “Soul Man” Sam and Dave
10. “Big Machine” Goo Goo Dolls
11. “A Pain that I’m Used To” Depeche Mode
(Please?)
12. “Dirty Business” The Dresden Dolls
(Yes, if I ever get slings in Paris – they will be from the dumpster.)
13. “An American Prayer” The Doors
(I love the lyric “I touched her thigh and Death smiled.” I don’t exactly know why.)
14. “Vincent” Don McLean
15. “You Could Have It So Much Better” Franz Ferdinand
16. “The Bitch is Back” Elton John
17. “Rush” Depeche Mode
18. “Green Onions” Booker T. and the MGs
19. “Broken City” Audioslave
(So what if it was actually written about Detroit? I can make it about Memphis.)
20. “You May Be Right” Billy Joel
21. “Pretty Noose” Soundgarden
22. “Laughing Out Loud” The Wallflowers
(Cause things are so ridiculous in my life, that laughing is the only correct response. Perhaps followed by crying. People known to be sane agree with me.)
23. “Seven Nation Army” The White Stripes
(Perhaps, when the inevitable crack-up does occur, I will go be a welder in Wichita.)
24. “Rusty Cage” Soundgarden
25. “Carry on Dancing” Savage Garden
26. “Flagpole Sitta” Harvey Danger
(“...to see a little bit clearer, the rottenness and evil in me...”)
27. “Mississippi Squirrel Revival” Ray Stevens
(one can only hope)
28. “A Little Less Conversation” Elvis Presley
(yes, the Ocean’s Eleven remix)
29. “All Apologies” Nirvana (Maybe this should follow “Dirty Business.”)
30. “Bright Lights” Matchbox Twenty
31. “California Dreamin’” The Mamas and the Papas
(As much as I love Memphis, I hope to be relocating to California at some point in the near future.)
32. “Smile Like You Mean It” The Killers
(Someone is, in fact, playing a game in the house that I grew up in.)
33. “Mean Town Blues” Johnny Winter
34. “Evil” Interpol
(Cell mate? You mean, I could have a cell mate instead of talking to the wall? Surely you must jest. No seriously.)
35. “The Dead of Night” Depeche Mode
(I will be jet-lagged. This will be fun, fun, fun.)
36. “Manic Depression” Jimi Hendrix
(Self-explanatory.)
37. “Curbside Prophet” Jason Mraz
38. “What a Scene” Goo Goo Dolls
39. “What You Live By” Harvey Danger

iTunes tells me that this puppy is 2.4 hours worth of music. Should get me through at least part of the flight. Will probably add more as I goes along. It is a ten hour flight from Frankfurt to NYC, I think. Hopefully, no obnoxious little boys this time around.

Trainwreck Fascination: It Just Keeps Getting Better

A: This post will be rather inappropriate.
B: I seriously need to find better uses of my time.

Setting: Facebook. Church of Christ Group. Discussion Board. Watching from Sidelines Only. With Malicious Glee.

(linking, but I think having facebook will be necessary) Topic: "Is Masturbation, In and Of Itself, Sinful"

And just in case that weren't potentially amusing enough, we have one fellow obsessed with wet dreams. (Do I hear Augustine calling? Yes, yes, I do.) So this is literally the best quote ever to be found in an online fundie discussion:

I do agree that alot of people stimulate masturbation with lust(male & female) yet you can masturbate without sinning(thinking impure sexual thoughts). Wetdreams(half voluntary half involuntary) are a natural thing God created for us to enjoy. It's just man corrupted it with impure things.

Made even better by the follow-up question of "what's a wet dream?"

Randomly Religious

Are you like me and have trouble with defining your religion? Don't worry. Steven Colbert is looking at for you and has the solution -- The Religion Randomizer!

h/t: Reclaiming the F Word